Results

I just real quickly wanted to report that I got 95% on theb test which I allowed to life tilt me. How fucking stupid! I have no clue why but tests drive me mad.

Why my life RULES!!!

I am my own boss. I have the most amazing girlfriend who loves me unconditionally. She has also allowed me the privelage of fathering her son. He is the most amazing human I know and also loves me unconditionally. Even though my family is one strange bunch they all love me unconditionally as well. I have proven that I can be succesful at something I am truly passionate about(POKER). Though I am still unsure of the real reason why I continue to attend, school comes easy to me for the most part. That is I give little effort and get decent grades. As for needs I have everything I truly need to get by in this world. As for wants I have the ability to achieve all I want. I have a super chill roomate who is actually a very close friend. basically my life is like a million times better right now then it was 1 year ago.

Why I am having a shit day? I allowed myself to let my early test frustrate me and escalate into a really negative vibe. I then decided to dwell in that vibe and some how found myself playing poker. Thus attracting some sweet coolers which escalated to me really fucking hating myself for a brief minute. Its been along time since I have been this down. This is why I wrote this blog. Life is good. It really is for the most part. Of course I want to quit school and focus 100% on poker but something keeps me going back. Its like I feel I have to get a degree for myself. In reality I have to complete this semester and then I will see how summer goes. I think if I do decide to finish school I am going to try to do my last 2 years in 3 semesters.

Lastly I have faithful blog readers who comment.

Hi

Ok so life has been stupid busy and I havent been blogging like ever. Thought it might be time for a quicky. For those who dont know I am attempting to wrap up my JC life by taking the last three classes I need to transfer this semester. I am a luckbox when it comes to instructors so my work load is super light. I do fear that the tests are going to be harder then excpected though as two of my instructors grade solely on tests. I dont hate this method but it can be challenging for those who dont study and test well.

Poker life has been great but being back in school sucks. Its fu8nny as now that I am back at college I am enjoying and wanting to do all things poker that much more. I wish I was as determined when I took a semster off from college as I am now. If you dont read my other blogs then you might not know that last month was actually my best ever as a profeshional poker player and I have started my climb to higher stakes. Currently I am playing 200NL and 400NL, this means I buy in for 400 or 200 dollars at a time.

On life, things are good. The major bump in the road right now is my living situation. Its super hard not living with my GF and son. It pains me to not see them to bed and wake with them in the morning. Plus all the other dynamics of actually residing in the same house. Unfortunately for financial and other reasons it looks like the separate housing will remain till August. Only 6 months I believe.

Health wise I am doing quite well. Of course I eat junk now and again but I am down to like 213 and dropping pounds as we speak. I havent missed a gym day since I started back(6 weeks). As for the drinking I have only gotten trashed once(superbowl) this year and kept my consumption to a minimum.


All and all I have alot to be grateful for. Of course I would chamge some things but, fuck, life is good.

Life is...

...too short. I dont know why I typed that. Anyways as you know I am always reading and the latest book is the 7 habits of highly effective people. the 1st habbit is becoming proactive. I havent fully grasped the whole idea but it centers on realizing that you create how you feel and no one else. Think about that statement. It is true. "Ah that jerk cut me off what a dick." You created that reality. I am mad because... You choose this emotion. You are the creator of your condition. This is obviously dumbed down. Let me give an exert: "Look at the word responsibility-"response-ability"- the abilty to choose your response. Highly proactive people recognize that responsibility. They do not blame circumstanes, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. their behavior is a product of their own concious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.
Because we are, by nature, proactive, if our lives are a function of conditioning and conditions, it is because we have, by concious decision or default, chosen to empower those things to control us.
In making such a choice, we become reactive."

Quick ramble

2008 has been awesome so far. Made it to the snow once already on an epic day, spending time with the loves of my life and my job is going well too. The biggest news is without any coercing Marcello has begun calling me Dad. At 1st I was unsure how to react but it is amazing to be quite honest. Now i just need to step my game up. Big things are in the works for 2008, big things. For x-mas I got a killer book from my dad's fiance called "Excuse me your life is waiting" I strongly recommened giving it a read. It is about the law of attraction but the read is simple and entertaining yet packed with knowledge. Sorry for the lack of posts. Dont excpect an abundance anytime soon because now I have even less time with school being under way.

2008 goals

To conclude 07 hasnt been too bad, but life can only get better. 08 will be the best year of my life. Poker will continue to be my profession as I pound the books. I will have my 08 goals posted soon. Stay positive know and feel what you want and it will become. Everythign we dream is possible IS.

As promised I will outline my goals and desires for 2008, in no particluar order.

• Transfer to a four year college.
• Get in the best shape of my life.
• Move in with the love of my life and our son.
• Continue improving my poker game while steadily moving up the stakes(see poker blog).
• Enjoy every moment of every day.
• Reduce my alchol intake to next to nothing.
• Travel.
• Learn to surf.
• Eat and live healthy.

I probably could come up with a few more but this looks pretty solid. I may examine each goal and discuss how it will be achieved later. Today is my last day of being a drunken bum so i am sitting here drinking beer. I am very excited about 08. This is going to be a great year. May you all have an awesome New Year!!!

P.S. Be safe, dont drink and drive.

Life is what you ______ make it.

Who didnt know that? For most of my early years I chose to struggle. I was always in trouble in school or with the law. I never truly enjoyed living much and many times considered suicide. Now this isnt some sob story or attempt at inspiration either, just the cold hard truth. It took a real fucking scare to shake some sense in me actually. That scare was a short stint in juvy. Losing my freedom made me realize just how precious it was. That was when I was 17 and hear I sit nine years later. I would like to believe I am a different person. I dont consider life to be a struggle like I used to. I welcome evry new day and enjoy the small things in life. Basically what I am getting at is, "life is what you choose to make it." From this point on I will choose to live an amazing life.

I have always been on and off some form of diet and excercise, unfortunately I opted to go on an eating bonanza to end 2007. Said bonanza has packed on more wieght then I would like. I am actually somewhat uncomfortable in my own skin and will be making a serious strike at getting back in "beach" shape. I will be back to 200lbs or less asap. School will be starting again on the 17th of January and I have 3 classes left at the JC. Yes the JC. My plan is to be said and done with college pre 29. This gives me a little over two years to get it done.

Poker has been a rough and rocky road but a true blast. I would have never thought I would be playing the game so seriously when I 1st started at 19. I didnt achieve the goals I set for myself but I didnt do to bad. I envisioned myself beating the 400s for a solid win rate at this point but I am currently at the 200s. To have made it from 25NL to 200NL in a 9 month span and turned a $100 deposit into over 20K isnt to shabby. In no way am I disappointed and I did get fortunate to hit the bad beat jackpot for 5.6k. To be honest the real struggle was exactly what this blog is about. I chose, unknowingly, to make poker hard at times. A few bad bluffs mixed with a few bad beats and I would begin to doubt my abilities. Even lately I have struggled to just believe in my skills. I know I have what it takes, and then some, to beat this game at any level. This in no way means I will be taking a shot at higher levels outside of my bankroll. Banroll managment has been the key to my success and will continue to be.

To conclude 07 hasnt been too bad, but life can only get better. 08 will be the best year of my life. Poker will continue to be my profession as I pound the books. I will have my 08 goals posted soon. Stay positive know and feel what you want and it will become. Everythign we dream is possible IS.

I am a Warriors fan and I do believe!!!